How can I get to know my genitals?

Time to read 2 min

How can I get to know my genitals?

When we are born as babies, we want to be touched, caressed, kissed and held. This tells the little creatures that they are loved and safe. The various physical touches between close caregivers begin from day one. In connection with changing diapers, there is also touching of the genitals. Already there, our brain makes connections to how our genitals are evaluated:

How does the person react when they see the genitals?

What is the facial expression like?

How is the genitals touched?

What words accompany the wrapping procedure?

In any case, even babies notice these subtleties. When it comes to language acquisition later, the connotation flows into the gender naming.

"Schnäggli, Schätzli, Löchli, Pippi, Puller, Fifi, Scheide, Mumu" (I could go on with this list forever...!) are names that small children have in their word repertoire when they talk about their genitals. Belittlements, sometimes also devaluations and absurd terms, which characterize a “first acquaintance”. What is the relationship with their own genitals like when these people grow up? Do they still talk about “Schnäggli” or “Pipi”? Do we want that?

As a mother and sexologist, I would like to recommend to all parents that they refer to their children's genitals as follows: VULVA and PENIS. Ultimately, not only parents are involved in this designation, but also teachers, educators, specialists, etc.

For many parents this seems too “out there” or too “adult”. But my experience in sexological practice is that adults still say “Mumu” ​​or “Pfifli”. How this designation affects our perception of our own body, our gender identity and ultimately our perception as a sexual being is demonstrated in my practice in Basel. Many people don't know their genitals - have little or no connection to it! This also has an impact on our sex life.

In any case, this is not only due to the naming of their genitals, but also how it allowed them to build a relationship with themselves and their bodies. Our language influences our thinking, our feeling and ultimately our being.

That's why I want to encourage people to: Look at your genitals in the mirror, greet them, touch them in a variety of ways and play with them (with or without a sex toy)! Get to know your genitals! Because in this way you find out what you like, what you find exciting, what you find satisfying and beautiful during sex with yourself or with other people.

The relationship to one's own gender empowers people as a whole and promotes a self-determined, free and holistic perception of the whole body!

The author of this blog post

Melina Dobroka

Sexologist MA

Sexologist: in FSS

Malzgasse 25

4052 Basel

+41 79 194 81 91