Strap-ons – dildos worn with a belt or harness system – have long since found their place in the sex lives of many couples. They open up new perspectives, role reversals, and forms of pleasure. Whether in heterosexual or queer relationships, strap-ons make sexuality more versatile and experimental.
In this guide, you'll learn about the possibilities strap-ons offer for sexual intercourse, what types there are, how to get started, and what you should keep in mind.
What is a strap-on?
A strap-on is a sex toy that features a dildo or vibrator attached to a harness. This allows one person to wear it "like a body part" and take the active role during penetration.
Strap-ons usually consist of:
Harness : adjustable straps or panties that are fixed to the pelvis.
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Attachment : a dildo, vibrator or plug that is inserted into the harness.
Who is interested in strap-ons?
Strap-ons are extremely versatile. They can be fun for:
Heterosexual couples : for role reversal or pegging (when the woman penetrates the man anally).
Lesbian couples : for penetration in different positions.
Queer couples : to experience flexibility, equality and desire in new ways.
Couples with erection problems : Strap-ons can provide independence from physical erection.
Possible ways of playing with strap-ons
1. Pegging
During pegging, the woman penetrates the man anally with a strap-on. Many men discover a new erogenous zone in the process: the prostate.
2. Vaginal penetration
In lesbian or queer relationships, the strap-on allows penetration similar to vaginal intercourse.
3. Double penetration
Some harness models allow the attachment of two dildos at the same time – for vaginal and anal penetration at the same time.
4. Reciprocal strap-ons
Models that simultaneously stimulate the wearing partner, e.g., through internal dildos or vibration modules.
5. Interactions & role reversal
Strap-ons are popular for role play, power shifts (dominance/submission) or for experimenting with identity and gender roles.
What types of strap-ons are there?
Classic harness with interchangeable dildos : flexible and durable.
Panty or brief models : more discreet and easier to put on.
Hollow strap-ons : for men who want to wear the dildo over their penis.
Vibrating strap-ons : for additional stimulation for both partners.
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Double-sided strap-ons : one end penetrates the wearer, the other penetrates the partner.
Tips for getting started with strap-ons
Start slowly – especially with anal penetration, lubricant, time and relaxation are important.
Communication – discuss desires, limits and fantasies beforehand.
Adjust the size – it’s better to choose a smaller dildo to start with.
Use lubricant – preferably water-based to protect the material.
Positions vary – missionary position, cowgirl position, doggy style or spooning – many things are possible.
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Strap-On & Safety
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Choice of material : Body-friendly silicone is hygienic and easy to clean.
Use condoms : especially if you have multiple partners or if you are switching between vaginal and anal sex.
Cleaning : Clean the dildo thoroughly after each use, wash the harness if necessary.
Psychological aspects
Strap-on sex is not only physically but also mentally exciting:
Role reversal : Those who are usually passive can actively penetrate – and vice versa.
Power games : Especially in the BDSM context, strap-on can express a form of dominance.
Self-confidence : Strap-ons can increase body confidence, regardless of erections or gender.
Strap-ons in relationships
For many couples, experimenting with strap-ons brings new life to their sex life. Important:
Openness and curiosity instead of shame.
Respect your partner’s boundaries.
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Humor – because things might slip up or seem unusual the first time you try something.
Conclusion: More opportunities for pleasure & closeness
Strap-ons are a versatile sex toy that brings fun, closeness, and variety to the bedroom. Whether pegging, vaginal penetration, double stimulation, or role play—the possibilities are wide and adaptable to your desires.
If you're curious, it's worth starting small and exploring together with your partner what you enjoy. Strap-ons aren't a substitute for "real" sex, but rather an extension of your pleasure possibilities.
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